Wednesday, October 20, 2010

SIX POUNDS OF FLESH

Everyone's a goddamn survivor, unless you're dead.

Bobby asked me to write a blog entry and I told him I wouldn't have a lot of nice things to say. But he insisted and said he appreciates my "honesty" and that he wants this to be "real."

It doesn't get more real than this. I cut off my left arm with a knife and watched my business partner and friend of seven years get his brains mashed up right in front of me.

I hacked off my arm and dropped it down a plastic chute. I saw it hit the scale and then I had three long seconds to think about my life before we ran out of time.

Yes, I spent years ripping people off, gaining their trust and contracting them into loan schemes that would ruin their lives. I made money by destroying families. No, I don't do it anymore. I regret hurting anyone. I regret Eddie had to die. I regret every day that I wake up with just one arm, with the trauma of that night burnt into my brain.

Yes, I'm a survivor. He didn't kill me. I still get out of bed and when I look in the mirror I feel all right about what I see. I've got six pounds less on my body and I know I can get through my life without hurting anyone else ever again.

Everyone should have a chance alone in a room with a meat cleaver. Maybe motherfuckers would get a lot nicer.

-Simone

9 comments:

  1. I for one am glad to see you've learned your lesson, Simone. Now the only one armed bandits are in Vegas, Atlantic City and reservation casinos. You take with you the renewed appreciation of your life. And now the best part is, you can go on game shows dealing with trivia, and if you have no clue as to the answer, you can say "I'm stumped." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Oh come on, if you can't laugh at your own horrific disfigurement what can you laugh at?

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  2. Simone, I commend your bravery. I wonder if you've really thought through your experience, rather than reacting like an animal who chews off its arm to survive a trap. I believe your experience may well have been profound. But one important correction to your writing: not EVERYONE is actually a survivor. Think about that.

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  3. This whole website seems soo real!! They've done a great job at creating the characters to make a blog entry-it seems very realistic! i LOVE SAW!

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  4. Hi, I want a game to play, unless you have made your error on your account that you have seen and learned of it. However, throw some do not still have the same eye on things as I do on any other of you is congratulations, you survived and appreciate your life back for you no GAME OVER, but a new beginning. Congratulations to all who have survived, and of course respectful to the survivors.

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  5. Simone, I understand what Jigsaw has done to your life. Ruined it. I, for one, am scarred for life because of that "man". I have burns extending down my arms and back. I will not go into the gory details. I just thought that I'd let you know that you're not as alone as you may think.

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  6. What the fuck is this here :
    Simone, I understand what Jigsaw has done to your life. Ruined it. I, for one, am scarred for life because of that "man". I have burns extending down my arms and back. I will not go into the gory details. I just thought that I'd let you know that you're not as alone as you may think.

    I know who you are, and I watch all tested to provide the cost of general recognition.

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  7. Oh come on, writers. You almost had the voice, but you lost me when you said how long she'd been at this. Howard was 27/28 at the time of filming, and actors and actresses tend to play younger. I'm not convinced Simone had been doing this since high school. Nobody gets a job like this because they have such high hopes for a career in the area of screwing people over, and certainly not as teenagers when some understanding of ACCOUNTING is necessary. I know you guys weren't after realism or anything, but this doesn't do Tanedra Howard's performance justice at all -- the actress was more real than the material, apparently. Most disappointed.

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